by Njel de Mesa
CHARACTERS:
PATIENT1- more frenetic, frantic and scurrying from trauma
PATIENT2- more contemplative and controlled
*patient 1 and 2 is the same patient and should be played by the same actor
WARDEN- an inexperienced clinical psychiatrist
(In an Asylum, a solitary confined disheveled, slovenly patient is found kneeling on the ground trembling in prayer. There is wide hospital bed in the middle but there are no signs of medication anywhere inside the patient’s quarter. There is a hospital bed Downstage Right of the patient’s quarter and a small table with two chairs Downstage Left. This Patient may be male or female depending on the statement of the production. After a brief moment of awkward silence, the patient’s eyes dart open.)
PATIENT 1: (To someone) You hear that?
PATIENT 2: (Peeking.) What?
PATIENT 1: I think we’re alone now…
PATIENT 2: What’s new…get used to it… (Sits down resigned. Beat. After a brief moment of contemplation, abruptly decides to escape in haste.)
PATIENT 1: (Pacing, back and forth.) Where are we going? (Pauses in terror.) Wait a minute. (Shaking.) We’re going to retreat to the mountains again aren’t we?
PATIENT 2: (Silence.)
PATIENT 1: (Irked and indignant.) Answer me! I asked you a simple question!! We’re going there… aren’t we? There is no denying… I can see it… in your eyes…(Panting. Patient2 is about to cry.) …you’re about to cry again…
PATIENT 2: (Silence.)
PATIENT 1: No. (Definite.) I am not coming with you. Don’t you see… I don’t want to cry with you anymore. I’d also want THAT something that we’d want for them…(As if someone were grasping on to the patient’s wrists.) Go on… On your own… I’ll leave you alone if you’ll leave me alone. Either way we are alone.
PATIENT 2: It’s funny how you promised them they will never be alone—You will make it so. (Beat)—They won’t be but you will. (Laughs tauntingly.) HAHAhahHahahAaa!!
PATIENT 1: (Screams in anguish.) Stop it! That’s not true!
PATIENT 2: HahahAHAHAHaha!!
PATIENT 1: I said STOP IT!!
(Warden nonchalantly enters, whistling a tune, and sarcastically attends to the patient. He tries to put the patient back to sleep.)
WARDEN: Whoa! Whoa! Easy… You’ve got company again tonight, eh?
PATIENT 1: No, no, just me. Alone.
WARDEN: I see. (Looks inside the patient’s quarters.) …your human mind giving you troubles again lately? (Beat.) …Seems to me you’re more complicated than the others.
PATIENT 2: Glad you see it that way.
WARDEN: Hmm…(Checks his clipboard and records.) So, you’re here for… ah… yes… I see… “Psychiatric help due to excessive leadership based on love” (Scoffs at the idea.) …THAT can really drive you nuts… I see… now I’ll try my best to avoid it—
PATIENT 2: Somehow I’d want to discourage and encourage you at the same time…
WARDEN: (Changing the subject.) Well then… no more screaming interruptions… Please try to have sweeter dreams this time…(Warden traces a cross on the Patient’s forehead. Patient restrains the Warden from doing so.)
PATIENT 2: No. Not tonight. (Shaking.) I am terrified of that… I’m trying to forget.
WARDEN: Very well. Sweet dreams… (Warden exits.)
(Patient tries to sleep. Suddenly, the patient grumbles as if someone were interrupting his/her sleep.)
PATIENT 1: Mmmm… Mmmm… (Grumbling.) …Go to sleep… The warden said sweet dreams… let’s just have what he says… Let’s give us just one quiet night please…
(After a few moments of silence.)
PATIENT 1: (Rude awakening, putting two pillows to cover his/her ears.) Stop filling your head with thoughts. I can’t sleep when they’re on. Can’t you turn them off?! (Rising from the bed.) Aaargh! I’m up! I’m up! What is it?! Just keep it down…
PATIENT 2: (Silence.)
PATIENT 1: Great…Not another one of your cold, silent treatments… Make up your mind if you’re going to talk or not. Enough of this hang-up! You should’ve said what you should’ve said when you thought you shouldn’t have… Now you’ve lost that chance… along with your mind… I’ll pick up where we left off…(Going back to sleep. Reprimands Patient2.)…and don’t you go looking for any more of those little lone lost sheep in the middle of my sleep… You’re making a habit of it… Goodnight.
PATIENT 2: (Abruptly stands up.) I am …ready to talk now.
PATIENT 1: Good. I’ve been meaning to listen…
PATIENT 2: (Long Silence.)
PATIENT 1: (Looking around as if someone were pacing in front of him/her.) Take your time… I’m not going anywhere… I’ll just be here…(Impatiently but kindly sits down.)
PATIENT 2: I am not happy anymore.
(A long pause.)
PATIENT 1: Okaaay… and…
PATIENT 2: I should’ve died last night. I fervently prayed to be destroyed and be numbed of this pain but I don’t know why I was granted this privilege.
PATIENT 1: (Smirks.) To keep me company…
PATIENT 2: Please…
PATIENT 1: …I’m sorry …Go on…
PATIENT 2: (Chuckles.) I’m crazy—
PATIENT 1: --They saw that one coming… you should’ve gone home when they told you—(Patient2 is offended with this interruption.) …oops …sorry… Go on…
PATIENT 2:… for trying to make them understand what they cannot. Time was never on my side to begin with… A year and a half is a short time to discuss a lengthy dissertation about everything I said…to explain how… why things are… were… should be… I thought I made it clear that discipleship is a discipline rooted in trustful vulnerable docility and not in smug suggestions on how to run things… That they follow me in my desire to please the Father… that… we would all let go of our previous nets and set out to the open seas… and become fishers of men… and there… in our short-lived long journey… there is NOTHING… that we shall ever want… ever again. (Pause.) But we are only human… and the fear of being alone… detached… comes easy. No matter how we keep it away by minding other things… It always comes back and finds us…
PATIENT 1: We are no different from these people…
PATIENT 2: I thought they’d see it that way. And admire, our efforts… our example… of stewardship… of discipleship. (Kneels as if Jesus in Gethsemane.) They… my friends, my friends—
PATIENT 1: OUR Friends…
PATIENT 2: Our brothers and sisters. Them, whom we love… they… have screamed in silence…(Silence.)… “Crucify him, Crucify HIM, CRUCIFY HIM!”… because they did not admit nor understand their fears… of being detached… of being alone… of not having… any possessions… anymore. And did not understand the joy of being detached… of not having… any possessions anymore…(Beat.) So in the blindness of their rage, they filled their emptiness with loud noises and voices of abject invectives to bring down the one person they thought they could live without…
PATIENT 1: Me…
PATIENT 2: Yes. You.
PATIENT 1: (Sarcastic.) They called it… justice.
PATIENT 2: Forgive them. For they did not… they do not… know what they were… are doing…
PATIENT 1: Easy for you to say…
PATIENT 2: No, it’s not. (Pause.) No, it’s not…
PATIENT 1: And so we live out this pain of understanding them… so they may live life to the fullest. Is that it?
PATIENT 2: (Nodding.) Let’s just hope they do. Come now… we have to be the healer now…
PATIENT 1: (Rising on his/her bed.) NO! I told you I am NOT coming with you! Let go of me! Let go! No! I said…(Calls for back-up.) WARDEN! WARDEN! Help me, I want to stay!!! WARDEN!!!
PATIENT 2: I am also in as much pain as you are…let us not give up…
(Warden enters.)
WARDEN: (While assisting the patient to come and calm down.) What is it? Something happened? What’s on your mind…
PATIENT 1: Promise me. I am never to leave this place.
WARDEN: Are you sure that’s what you want?
PATIENT 2: No.
WARDEN: Déjà vu…
PATIENT 1: I don’t want to die again!!
WARDEN: My! My! (Writes on his reports over his clipboard. Escorting the patient to a more comfortable position. Playing along.) I’m missing out on so much fantastic information… Let me grab a chair… I might be too blown away by your imagination’s machinations… to yourself… So… kindly fill me in…
PATIENT 2: Yes, yes, yes, I had that purpose… to fill all of you in…
WARDEN: Well…(In a clinical way.) Isn’t it grand…(Mocking.)… I’m givin’ you your job back… (Sits down. Notices a loot bag.) What’s this??!
PATIENT 1: I have food that you do not know of…
WARDEN: Most certainly. (Irate.) And why have you been keeping this from me… You do know this is totally against in-patient protocols here… you can be nailed for this…(Opens the paper loot bag. Warden discovers a chalice, a vial with a little wine and a loaf of bread.) …Don’t tell me left overs…
PATIENT 2: (Patient 2 talking to Patient 1) Keep quiet!
WARDEN: (Offended.) Who me?
PATIENT 2: No not you.
PATIENT 1: That’s okay too. (Patient 2 tells Patient 1 to shut up.)
WARDEN: (Offended.) No. I think I’ll talk some more… You’ve been making all these “hushed” voices echo down the hall that discourages me from taking a doze… Might as well play along with you…
PATIENT 2: This is not a game. And all you need to play is the truth. Can you handle that?
WARDEN: (Playing along.) Okaaaay... I’ll play the truth…
PATIENT 2: Good. So, you can set us free…
PATIENT 1: (In a low frantic tone.) But I am the truth…
PATIENT 2: (Whispers.) I know…but he doesn’t know that. We’re just trying to get out, alright?
WARDEN: Uhm…Excuse me…May I…
PATIENT 1: (Abruptly. Shouting at Patient2.) NO!! I said NO!!
WARDEN: Okay! Okay! (Pause.) I’m sitting this one out. This game gets rather confusing when I really don’t know how many are playing. (Suggesting seriously.) I think one of you ought to die again… that way… uhm… one of you would… feel better…
PATIENT 2: It’s not that simple. Death is something to be earned. I have the authority to lay it down and to take it up again…
WARDEN: So, make up your mind whether you are to live or die? (Sardonic.) Hehe.
PATIENT 2: I will only lay down my life …only to take it up again.
WARDEN: So what really happened then, technically speakin’, why DID you die, in the first place?
PATIENT 2: I came back to where I came from. Where I was born.
WARDEN: (Tauntingly.) Why? Did you FAIL in your mission?
PATIENT 2: No. As a matter of fact, I realized coming back was my mission—
PATIENT 1: And realized… a prophet is never welcome in his own…
PATIENT 2: Sshh—not now— I do not regret anything. I have burned those kinds of bridges for I know THAT will not get me anywhere…
WARDEN: (Perfunctorily while Warden is busy scribbling notes.) Well, staying in here won’t get you anywhere either…
PATIENT 2: Exactly.
PATIENT 1: Uh-oh.
PATIENT 2: Have some bread and wine… to remember me by…
WARDEN: (Superficial.) Oh,…Let us have a party! (Starts chewing the food and drinking the wine.)
PATIENT 1: Uh-oh.
PATIENT 2: I’m very fond of finding reasons to celebrate! Here take this…eat it. (Patient opens the loot bag and reveals the chalice, wine vial, and the loaf of bread. Patient breaks the bread, hands a half to the Warden.) If you need more wine, I’m sure I can do something about that…
PATIENT 1: Uh-oh.
WARDEN: Wine’s out. Can I have some more?
PATIENT 2: Yes,…drink... (Touches the chalice and gives it back to the Warden.)
PATIENT 1: (Screaming. Taking the chalice away from the Warden.) NOOOOooooO!!
WARDEN: Okay! Now…now… No need to yell. Calm down… Have a piece… Chew on THAT (Passes the piece of bread to the Patient.)…it may relieve much tension…(Scribbles on his clipboard.)…I would assume you don’t get much visitors…
PATIENT 2: Ever since that fateful day…most of my friends fell asleep or silent…Some denied me more than three times…
WARDEN: (Petulant.) Was it something you said? Hehe.
PATIENT 2: Yes.
WARDEN: Oh.
PATIENT 2: I told them… I am… (Rising.)
WARDEN: You are? Who? (Scoffs.) He- Man? She-Ra? (Scribbling.)
PATIENT 2: I am… Before Abraham was born,…I am.
PATIENT 1: And they stoned you after you said that… and you went out and hid yourself… Do you really want to do that again?
WARDEN: (Petulant.) I am… (Whispers to himself.) stoned… man.
PATIENT 2: I had my fair share of people disliking what I proclaimed… didn’t mind them much though—
PATIENT 1: Much to their annoyance.
PATIENT 2:--for they saw my instructions as demands… not as a way of life that they need to follow…
WARDEN: Who were these people? Would you remember their names?
PATIENT 2: Are you writing down what I say down because you want to help me…
PATIENT 1: (Throws a fit.)…or persecute me…
PATIENT 2: Or because you want me to make a sensational story so I can make money for you…
WARDEN: (Threatened.) What do you mean?
PATIENT 2: Do you break bread with me to be with me or to betray me?!
WARDEN: (Trying to cover up something.) Huh?!
PATIENT 1: (Talking to Patient 2.) Ever had that feeling? Everybody’s quoting and taking credit for what you’ve said when they don’t even follow it…
WARDEN: I see… you see. (In a hushed tone.) You seem like a business minded fella’… Here. (Hands over a small bag of money.) …For your story…
PATIENT 1: (Without inspecting.) Thirty pieces of silver! Keep your money.
PATIENT 2: This man do not live on that alone…
WARDEN: Impressive. It is common knowledge that without these…(Referring to the money.) …you will die.
PATIENT 1: I won’t. I will never!
WARDEN: Uh-huh… If that’s so…(Playing along. Sarcastic.) What must I do to live forever?
PATIENT 2: Do you really want your question answered? You might not like mine.
WARDEN: (Challenging the Patient.) Hit me. (Preparing to take down notes.)
PATIENT 2: Go and sell everything. Give them to the poor. Detach yourself from anything. Then COME… FOLLOW… ME…
WARDEN: How in heaven’s name would I do that?
PATIENT 2: You just simply do it. Go figure it out like the rest of them who’ve made complicated excuses to that simple instruction.
WARDEN: (Scoffs.) Hahaha! What about myself? I also have to live right?
PATIENT 2: Precisely why you have to do it.
WARDEN: You’re incomprehensible.
PATIENT 1: No I’m not. You just don’t want to do it.
WARDEN: My religion tells me—
PATIENT 2: STOP! (Pause.) To “debate” you over this is a waste of time and energy. I don’t want to talk about religion. We’ll just end up quarreling. I’d rather that we’re not. Religion finds clever ways of disobeying what I say…
WARDEN: You mean to tell me… If you had a family who needed food to eat and—
PATIENT 2: You heard what I said. I thought it was simple enough.
WARDEN: (Mockingly.) Hahaha! You’re out of your mind.
PATIENT 1: (Laughs like a loon.) Hahaha!! You’re not the first to say so.
PATIENT 2: You want to be a perfect disciple right?
WARDEN: Supposing I—
PATIENT 2: Then follow. (Beat.) Teach all the nations to obey what I’ve said. And you can be sure I am always with you to the very end.
WARDEN: (Compromising. Changing the subject.) My, my… Look at the time. I’ve to get going. I tremendously enjoyed this conversation.
PATIENT 1: You didn’t.
WARDEN: Adieu. (Warden rushes off, embarrassed. Leaving his keys in the quarter.)
PATIENT 1: (Rising in frustration.) Bah! You see… It’s so easy for them to walk away from these things. As if nothing happened. As if you didn’t break bread with them…
PATIENT 2: Nonetheless… we cannot give up on them…
PATIENT 1: And then what? They’ll finally love me back. What if I get tired? What if I lose interest? What if I—
PATIENT 2: You won’t.
PATIENT 1: You seem sure. That’s what they don’t like about you… You always seem sure.
PATIENT 2: Love is the only thing certain in this life.
PATIENT 1: --I don’t want to do this anymore. I am dragging my feet the very same time I am trying to carry them. Where are you taking me? I feel like I am going somewhere but I’m not moving at all… There is no reason to go on. (Begins to cry.)
PATIENT 2: No, you can’t say that. We cannot give up.
PATIENT 1: Oh yes, I can! I am limited now, remember? I have the luxury to give up! They gave up on me! Why shouldn’t I on them?
PATIENT 2: Because you love them all…
PATIENT 1: (Breaks down.) I am tired… thinking of all their concerns… their needs… The now… the whens… the hows… The present… the non-negotiable truths of the past and the room for improvement for the future… all of them! They think I don’t think what they’re thinking… their wants and what’s best for them… All at the same time… and if they aren’t satisfied—what do they do?—they pray and file a complaint to management (Points to the sky.)…If they think they can do a better job loving …they can have mine!
PATIENT 2: This shouldn’t be about the position that you’re in, rather the disposition you must have in order—
PATIENT 1: In order that what? So they can shake their fists to the heavens because I didn’t heed them when they were clasped… and conveniently take the blame for the consequences of their decisions! Well, I am TIRED doing that for them!!!
PATIENT 2: So am I!!
PATIENT 1: Well, I AM HUMAN!!!
PATIENT 2: So am I!!
PATIENT 1: WHY ME?!!?
PATIENT 2: WHY NOT you?!!
PATIENT 1: Is there anybody else?
PATIENT 2: Precisely…and nobody…not in anytime…can do this job except you…
PATIENT 1: (Bursts out.) I KNOW!! Tell me something I don’t…(Falters to the ground crying.) ...Tell me …something …I …don’t… (After bawling, Patient calms down.)
PATIENT 2: Sshh… I am here… cast your burdens on me…
PATIENT 1: I know… We will never give up on them…
PATIENT 2: Do not worry. We are pleasing Him who matters most…
PATIENT 1: I am afraid.
PATIENT 2: I am very… But we shall face it. We cannot wait for our fears to fade… we will never begin… RISE (Encouragingly.)…I believe in you …We’ve turned worse things before… I believe in Him who believes in us… Do not be afraid… Just believe.
PATIENT 1: We’re not alone?
PATIENT 2: To be alone is to deny our reason for both being and becoming. We are here because we are not alone… for our desire is to please Him… who is always with us.
PATIENT 1: Yes, but sharing our desire with the rest of them, can get rather frustrating…
PATIENT 2: And painful… I know… You’ve heard me say so…(Brief moment of mustering the Patient’s energy.) We have piped and they have not danced… (Bursts out.) Oh! My Prodigal Brothers and Sisters! Come back! (Screaming. Bawling.) Please… COME BACK!! Turn away from sin and be faithful again… Deliver me inch by inch from this excruciating pain of longing for your fullness… that I cannot grant you if you do not want it for yourselves! I am begging you! Each of you! Take me back! Partake in the promises that my life is willing to sacrifice for… has sacrificed for! Please… this shepherd cannot sleep until each of you are found!! Where is my pride? Where is my dignity? You can have it! You can win over me! Have my pride, my dignity! Just as long as you come back from your prodigal days!! I cannot condemn… No, I can never… for I came not to judge but that you might all be saved… if you only listen to my plea…
PATIENT 1: You are mincing words to ears that will never listen…
PATIENT 2: Who has ears to hear… let them hear… Please… I don’t want to hear these voices that want to convince me that you are the mustard seeds that won’t grow… and that I have sacrificed in vain! What kills me… what pains me… what nailed me to THAT cross… what brought me here driven to the point of insanity… is my… and His… great love for you… All these difficult—
PATIENT 1: You never said it would be easy. You sent them sheeps in a pack of wolves… What makes you different?
PATIENT 2: I love them all. Both Sheeps and Wolves. And I willingly wait… and I willingly suffer… for I have accepted to be a part of this beautiful imperfect madness because…(Breaks the Fourth Wall.) I love you… I love you… and I want to teach you how to… why to… I want US to please Him who loved us FIRST!!! (Breaks down.)
PATIENT 1: You hear that?
PATIENT 2: What?
PATIENT 1: He speaks… The rocks… the trees…(Closes his/her eyes.)…the mountains …the wind …the water …everything …they are humming… (Humming a soft pleasant relaxing tune. To the Audience.) Do you hear?… He speaks…
PATIENT 2: I hear Him too.
PATIENT 1: We are no longer alone.
PATIENT 2: We never were.
PATIENT 1: He is telling me…
PATIENT 2: Let us dance… (To the audience.) …Rise… Come follow me…
(The music picks up into a merry tune. She encourages the audience to dance with him/her while praying the “Our Father”.)
PATIENT 1: Let it go.
PATIENT 2: It is finished.
PATIENT 1: Let it go. The season for crying is over. Let us wipe our tears and be strong… we cannot be weak anymore…(Wiping the tears from his/her eyes.)
PATIENT 2: This doesn’t mean we’re weak…this only means we’re…human.
PATIENT 1 and 2: (Picks up the keys left by the Warden. Looking up.) The delicate balance I must walk on… is easier to find when it is done to please YOU…Loving Father. (Breathes in.) I am… (Finally, patient throws the keys to the floor then collapses to rest and peacefully sleep on the bed.)
CURTAIN
* No part of these plays may be staged without a written permission from the author. For performance rights, permit to play, and inquiries email ktfi2001@yahoo.com or call 386.3278 /text (0917)9726514.
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